Karen Invents Christmas ‘Karening’ to Showcase Her Original Holiday Songs of Self-Acceptance

Hilarious Coworker Trish - Reductress

After failing to be selected for a solo in the All City Holiday Concert for the second year in a row, 37-year-old Karen Henry took it upon herself to travel door to door with her quirky yet life-affirming original songs, such as, “Hark, I’m Proud of My Body” and “Deck The Woman Who Runs the Choir,” in a new tradition she has dubbed, “Christmas Karening.”


“I saw her say congratulations to Carol Deevners, who got the solo,” says singer Emma Rhea. “But I don’t think she really meant it.”


Many in the choir joked that Deevners always got the solos in the Christmas carols, because her name is Carol, and that makes her good at caroling.


“Just because your named isn’t Carol doesn’t mean you can’t sing about what you feel at Christmas,” says Karen. “It’s the season of giving and this year I’m giving myself the gift of song.”


Karen then burst into her original tune, “The Twelve Days I Went Paleo.”



It was during Karen’s performance in front of city hall that a noise complaint was called in to the police. By the time the police arrived to the scene, Karen was halfway through her song, “It Came Upon a Lane Bryant Clearance Sale.”


“I let her going with a warning this time.” Officer Randy Weir said noting that Karen invited him to join her in a duet of her song, “Rocking Around with My Sweatpants On.”


Karen is running a Kickstarter campaign to raise funds in order to record her debut self-titled album, “Karening.”


“I’ll cobble together some more money after I return all the blouses from TJ Maxx,” said Karen, “ You know, the ones I sing about in Joy To Retail Therapy.”