‘I’m Doing Ketamine Therapy,’ Says Woman Who Just Goes Clubbing a Lot

According to 24-year-old Pamela Logan, ketamine can do wonders for your mental health, and she knows this because she’s been having ketamine treatments every weekend at different nightclubs across New York City.


“My life has totally changed since I started ketamine therapy,” Pamela said. “And I didn’t even need insurance to do it — just lots of money, fentanyl testing kits, and some of my closest friends!”


However, medical and mental health professionals have stated that this is, in fact, not ketamine therapy, and more of a ketamine habit, or possibly even an addiction.


“Ketamine therapy is an extremely controlled and precise treatment for depression. It’s either conducted with an IV infusion or nasal spray, starting with an induction phase and then regular infusions every two to six weeks,” ketamine specialist Dr. Victoria Domingo said. “So no, I don’t think that what Pamela is doing can be called ‘ketamine therapy’ because she just snorts it whenever she feels like it.”



Pamela’s friends have also noticed a distinct change in her behavior since starting the program.


“She definitely seems happier when she’s on K,” Justice Shehu said. “But I think it’s just because she’s high? Because when she’s not in the club, she’s just the same as she’s always been.”


But despite what the professionals say, Pamela still claims to see huge improvements with her mental health.


“Ketamine therapy has drastically changed the way I think and feel,” she said. “Like, when I do it in between taking shots all night, I hardly even feel hungover the next day. Could SSRIs ever do that? I don’t know because I’ve never tried them, but I don’t think so!”


Pamela also thinks that it’s a healthier alternative to other drugs that can affect your mood.


“I’ve compared it to other drugs like molly, shrooms, acid, and coke, and I have to say that ketamine is by far the best,” she told reporters. “Oh — and it also made my depression go away!”


When asked whether she has an actual diagnosis for depression, Pamela declined to comment.