Are you tired of walking around the neighborhood like everyone else? Fortunately there is a way to add more camp and subversion to your step. Walking is the best way to assert to your neighborhood that you’re not like everyone else: You have taste and most of all, you understand exactly what is “camp”. Here are the rules for walking around your neighborhood in a subversive and campy way.
Sway your hips and close your eyes.
This is the best way to start your walk off. It adds a flair of drama while allowing you to be grounded in the present moment. Add a little swoosh to your hips, but in kind of an exaggerated, self-aware way. You are seducing the entire block, but in a way that subverts the whole idea of seduction? Now that’s camp.
Wave to your neighbors, now quick – look away!
First, establish yourself as a shy romantic artistic neighbor type. This is where the subversion really kicks in: Make strong eye contact, then look away! Then do it again! The people on your walk want you but they can’t have you. Look at you, defying the rigid rules of walking down the street!
Sigh at every passerby.
There is a responsibility to spark public interest when cascading your beautiful body across your neighborhood. You have to show people that you’re upset that your Maison Margiela tabi sneakers came in a size too small. Let out a huge sigh around everyone you meet, but don’t explain yourself. They can’t figure you out. Give it 30 years for the world to embrace you as a cult classic.
Play your self-produced EP everywhere you go.
Most people walk around their neighborhood with air pods or headphones listening to music by people they don’t know. Well, you know the only artist who could ever get you is yourself. You have to blast your self-produced music loud enough so everyone can hear. You’re a disruptor, but you like…know it? That’s camp, baby! Also maybe they’ll buy your EP?
Well now you are ready for the streets of New York, Milan, or Berlin. If your town is not campy? Maybe it’s time someone shook up with streets with a whole lot of drama and style. You have to live in your campy truth, even if the streets are not ready. Now get out there, tiger, the neighborhood is ready to be subverted.