You feel like a boss, so why don’t you dress like one? Besides the fact that men will find you less attractive, there’s no reason to not bust out the shoulder pads and suit up! Here are some tips on how to make this iconic style work for you, even if it means a life of singledom where no man will ever see you as a sexual object ever again.
Know Your Measurements
A bespoke two-piece suit is an investment, but you can save money by taking a store-bought suit to the tailor to get a blazer and pants fitted for your exact body shape and measurements. But if you think wearing a precisely fitted blazer that shows off your most valuable assets will make a man forget to associate suit jackets with traditional masculinity, think again! He’ll still see that familiar businessy silhouette and become intimidated by your status, rendering him unable to approach you sexually as an object. Is it worth it?
Go For The Bold (Use Color!)
If you think suits are boring, open your eyes! Get a suit jacket in a pop of color like tangerine, cobalt, or chartreuse and make taking care of business look fun. Oops, did we say “business”? That’s right; even in a bold hue, a suit jacket still indicates you’re a woman with a respected position in society, and not some ditzy trophy who will laugh at all his jokes and never share her opinions. If you’re still interested in attracting a man even though you’re focusing on your career, better stick to a pencil skirt or something. Or better yet, just change clothes before he catches you in anything too professional-looking. You don’t want to be alone on Valentine’s Day again, do you?
Accessorize
Just because you’re wearing a suit doesn’t mean you can’t get a little creative! Rock your chunkiest statement necklace to spice up an otherwise conservative jacket and slacks combo. Pile on the bracelets, stack on the rings, and layer your chains! Have fun adding some feminine flair to the traditionally masculine combo, but don’t even for one second think that this jewelry will make a man attracted to you, a woman wearing a suit. Even though lots of women will compliment you on your cool charms and baubles, a man will just assume you’re tacky or trying too hard. And no amount of jewelry can erase the years of patriarchy that make men uninterested in women who seem more successful than them.
If you’re ready to forget about finding The One and just focus on attempting to earn the respect of your superiors in the workplace, go ahead and try out a suit! Pull on a blazer and some shapeless pants to attempt to erase all signs that you are a sexual being, and hope that the promotions start rolling in. Fingers crossed this gamble pays off with a man-sized paycheck!
