How to Have the Body Confidence of a Naked Toddler

No matter what you look like, learning to love your body is no easy task. We’re pelted with so many unattainable beauty standards and mixed messaging from media. And nobody has the body confidence of a young, naked toddler who has not yet been marred by the demands of society. But it is possible to find the body confidence of that brazen toddler with some time and effort. Here’s how:


Get Naked

Toddlers love to be naked. All they feel is the cool air on their skin, with not a thought in the world for how others might perceive them. Strip off all your clothes and start to get into that headspace of “I am just a body that eats and shits and nothing more.”


Scream, “I’m naked! I’m naked!”

Rather than wondering when you can put your clothes back on, imagine that your parents are trying to get you dressed or trying to get you into the bath. Now your nudity equals freedom. Run up and down the halls of your home, screaming, “I’m naked! I’m naked!” You’ll start to love the feeling of your flesh bouncing around in the breeze and slowly drown out all the negativity from the outside.


Say, “This is my butt.”

The more you playfully gesture to your butt, the more you’ll feel like it’s something funny to be proud of – because it is! Butts are ridiculous and you have one just hanging off the back of your body. That’s great! Throw a fart joke in there if you’re feeling particularly sophisticated for your age.



Poke at your genitals, trying to figure out what they are.

Curiosity is a great cure for judgment. Get in there. Pull things apart. Ask, “what’s that?” You’ll feel both more connected to your body and also less like it’s a thing you had a choice in or specifically fucked up. You didn’t make parts like this! You’re just a hapless rug rat, learning to make this thing move around.


It can be hard to live in a human women’s body. That’s why sometimes the best thing is to pretend you don’t! Embrace your curves like a chubby toddler!