When it comes time to give a blowjob, it can be tempting to play it safe and keep in line with the classic methodology. A perfect blowjob, however, requires originality, gumption, and the courage to do something different. Here’s how you can give him the perfect blowjob by blowing into the tip of his dick really hard and inflating him like molten glass.
Start by heating him up in the furnace.
Before you can properly blow his mind and body, you first must heat him up to about 2000 degrees, ensuring he is properly annealed before you begin blowing. The heat reduces the strain on the glass – sorry, his dick – in the blowing process. This step is super important: If you start the blowjob before heating him up, he might crack!
Bring him back and forth from the marver to the glory hole as you shape him.
For those who are unfamiliar, a marver is a flat metal slab where you can roll his peen to ensure it retains its shape throughout the blowing process. Alternate rolling his wee wee on the marver and putting it back in the glory hole (dirty word, but this is what it’s called!), which leads into a scorching hot furnace. This will keep him warm and malleable for blowing! He’s going to love this part.
Let the blowing begin.
Now that he’s all warmed up and shapely, it’s time to bring out your blowpipe – a long metal stick to bridge the gap from your lips to his nether regions – and get to blowing! Place the blowpipe on a steel stand, then rotate it as you blow warm air. When you start to see him slowly inflate, you’ll know you’re doing it right! Throughout this process, keep periodically re-heating him in the glory hole to make sure you’re operating at the proper temperature, which is, as mentioned, 2000 degrees.
Remove him from the pipe.
When you’re all done with your perfect blowjob, it’s time to disengage your blowpipe. Rotate the blowpipe (he might physically flip as you do this) and use steel tweezers called jacks to separate him from your utensil. You should be able to remove him with one solid tap! At this point, he will probably be super happy and he’ll look absolutely stunning. Side note: Be sure to always handle him with your special heat resistant gloves.
Let him cool for several hours in the annealing oven.
Now that he is properly blown, bring him to the annealing oven to cool off slowly. This measured cooling is super important, as he could break if exposed to rapid temperature changes. The benefit to this step is there is absolutely no time for him to reciprocate, so you don’t need to worry about pesky things like receiving head yourself!
There you have it: the perfect blowjob! If he’s really Mr. Right, when he’s finished cooling in the annealing oven, he’ll probably ask if that was “good for you, too.” Feel free to lie!
