Haircuts That Say, ‘My Middle School Ringtone Was My Chemical Romance’s ‘Welcome to the Black Parade’

While a pastel dyed ‘do might read trendy to the sheeple, it’s clear your origin story is Hot Topic, not Urban Outfitters. For the grown up emo who can no longer sport blood red or bright teal locks, you’ll stay true to your roots with this softer around the edges style that says, “My mom got me an LG Chocolate so she could get in touch with me when I went to the mall, but I never answered when she called because I was too busy listening to the stirring Black Parade intro that was my ringtone.”