Ugh, It’s Friday night and you have a date with a guy you super hate. He bears similarities to a number of famous dictators and at least one murderer. But when opportunity knocks, you have to answer: YOU CANNOT SAY “NO” TO A DATE.
But where to take a date you hate? Here are some easy, quick ideas!
A Restaurant Where You Can’t Eat Anything
Allergic to shellfish? Grab some sushi. Staunch vegan? Insist on a steakhouse, then complain about the menu. He’ll hate every second of it and probably you, too.
The Staten Island Ferry
How romantic! Uh, not so romantic when you wear stilettos and a tank top and then whine about how cold/uncomfortable you are. Show him what a total drag he’s asked out and chances are, this is your last date together.
A Real Bummer of a Documentary
Laugh at all the wrong parts. Then at the end, tell him you’re only laughing because you can totally relate to what they were going through. Bonus points if the doc is about a topic that doesn’t relate to you at all (Titanic, Japanese Holocaust, etc.).
A Body of Water
Convince him to skinny dip. Laugh at his penis. He’ll get the picture really fast.
A Series of Places You Know Are Closed
Wouldn’t the Planetarium be so fun? Oh, it’s closed at 9pm? What about that cool place that infuses everything with bacon? Oh, that closed five minutes ago? And I’m a vegetarian (see idea #1)! Keep insisting on places you know are closed and refusing to check Yelp. You’ll be the most insufferable person he’s ever spent time with.
Sometimes you just have to hang out with a guy you hate, but that doesn’t mean you can’t make sure he knows you hate him the entire time!