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How to Watch a Little Movie and Have a Little Opinion on It That You Text to Your Little Friends

Daredevil? This Woman Doesn’t Let Her Lean Cuisine Sit for Two Minutes Before Enjoying

Nonalcoholic Euphorics That Won’t Get You Drunk But Will Still Cost You $45

Woman Who Has Neglected Every Other Aspect of Health Thinking of Getting Into Hair Care

REPORT: This Bitch Thinks She Can Just Get Away with Using Canned Pumpkin

woman next to humidifier

Why I Stopped Dating Men and Started Dating My Humidifier

‘Both Parties Are Bad!’ Says Hometown Friend Who Made You Choose Between NSYNC and Backstreet Boys

Slutty Mask Has Lipstick Smeared Absolutely All Over

Mom Has No Memory of That Traumatic Childhood Event

Pandemic ‘Stigmatizing’, Reports the Pale and Fucked-Up Looking

Here’s How to Vote So Early That You Erase the Past

Originalist Dentist Defends Use of Leeches

serious woman next to clown running in woods

I Refuse to Live My Life in Fear. That’s Why I Choose to Live With This Killer Clown

woman talking next to muffin man

Do You Know the Muffin Man? Is He Single?

old woman lady smile elderly grandma happy

You Go Girl! Mother is Moisturizing Her Legs

hot dog - reductress

Woman Who Once Baked Fresh Sourdough Now Just Slamming Loose Lunch Meat

Nation Braces Itself for Spike in COVID-Themed Halloween Costumes

emily in paris next to woman

How to be More Like Emily in Paris When You’re Feeling Like Courtney in Rochester

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