So you’re a girl with a mysterious kind of beauty that likes to lead your boyfriend by the hand to strange and beautiful places – we get it! Unfortunately, you may not have a boyfriend who loves you enough to take videos of you every day in order to compile a beautiful montage of your life together, and that can be a hard truth to bear. If you’ve noticed your boyfriend is suspiciously never holding his phone up when he’s with you, here’s how to accept that that adorable montage to prove he really “sees” you is never gonna happen, girl:
Think about all the people out there who don’t have boyfriends at all.
Sure, you may be incredibly photogenic and do at least three cute things a day worth capturing, but think about all the people in the world who don’t even have boyfriends to see any of this – and in a pandemic, no less! When you find yourself frustrated about what you lack (a painstakingly beautiful montage of yourself), try finding gratitude in the things you have (a boyfriend with a lawn chair in his living room). Be thankful for what you have, you ungrateful bitch!
Admit it probably would have been bad, anyway.
Look – not everyone can be handsome, have a good job and also have the ability to find your light. Sure, you may have dated men like that in the past, but where are they now? Making films in LA and dating a much hotter woman? Maybe, but this guy is really good for you, and if he made you a montage, it would just be kind of embarrassing and unflattering and you’d still have to be like “wow thanks” and post it somewhere. So maybe you should just consider the lack of gift as the greatest gift of all!
Pin your hopes on poetry or some shit like that.
So maybe film is really not his medium – is he a writer? A musician? Does he have any other talents whatsoever? If you’re going to endlessly hope for a grand and performative proclamation of his love for you, pin your hopes on something he’s more likely to achieve, like writing a song about you, or an entire book of poetry with your name on it. It’s not as Instagrammable, but you have to appreciate that he’s trying, even if it’s sort of pathetic!!
Being a beautiful woman uncaptured on camera can sometimes feel like a waste of being alive – but don’t worry! You have a selfie stick and a tall man beside you, and that’s more than most women could ever ask for. Good luck, and sorry!!