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Author Archives for Eva Victor
How To Not Take It Personally When Prince Harry Marries Not You
I Proposed Because Our Schedules Line Up Scary Well
How To Gain His Trust By Stroking His Knee and Saying ‘Mhm’ Forever
4 Beanies That Say, ‘Yeah, I Tried A Skateboard Once’
How to Find Love by Staying in Bed Until Someone Throws a Pebble at Your Window
How to Put All Your Eggs Into One Sad, Chain-Smoking Basket
5 Diets to Look Up Then Promptly Forget About When Domino’s Sends You a Coupon
But How Could The Creator of a Movie Called ‘I Love You, Daddy’ Be a Predator?
Woman Just Trims Pubes Every So Often; Doesn’t Hold Herself To a Strict Schedule
5 Candles To Keep In Your Bathroom So It Smells Like A Shit-Perfume Combo
How To Tell If You’re Falling In Love or Just Grateful You Came So Hard
Richest Friend Just ‘Doesn’t Like To Cook’ and Would Rather Order In
5 Oversized Sweaters for When You Want To Feel Like The Simplest String Bean
How To Trust Him After He Says, ‘I Don’t Have Much of a Sweet Tooth’
How To Lose The Weight So You Can Finally Fit Into The Shredder and Peace Out
How To Show Him You Adore His Glorious Teeny Butt
4 Bathroom Sex Positions to Mix Things Up, Cause Boy Is This Starting to Get Boring
5 Self-Tanners That Say, ‘Wow, She Used a Self-Tanner’
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