Woman’s New Year’s Resolution Is to Lose Five Pounds She Put On The Week Before

Earlier today, 32-year-old Amanda Raker made a New Year’s Resolutions to lose the five pounds she put on the week before.


“I’m excited to take control of my health and reverse all the decisions I made last week during Christmas,” says Raker. “2017 means a new start, and a chance to the correct the tons and tons of empty calories I just ate, like an entire tin of Danish butter cookies at my family’s Christmas party.”


Raker’s friends and family support her resolution to lose the weight she gained in the week leading up to New Year’s.


“I’m really proud of her decision to get in shape since she’s been home,” says Raker’s younger sister, Grace. “She’s been going to a lot of holiday parties and just eating everything they serve, so it doesn’t surprise me she wants to make a change and finally undo all that damage.”


Raker confirms she ate the equivalent of an eight-course dinner over the span of an hour at her aunt Kim’s house, and plans to return to healthful eating immediately.


“In retrospect, I shouldn’t have done that,” says Raker. “I was full after the Christmas ham, and the pumpkin pie I managed to fit into my stomach after that was just a miracle. Anyway, now that I did all of that on purpose, I want to make it my number-one goal to reverse it.”



According to her sister, Raker did attempt to follow her resolution as soon as the clock struck midnight on January first.


“She put away the tub of mashed potatoes she was eating at our family New Year’s party and then signed up for a gym membership, so she was very quick to at least go through the motions of committing to her plan,” says Grace. “But we’ll see how long she actually sticks to it.”


At the conclusion of the interview, Raker could be seen taking one last gulp of eggnog before enforcing her resolution for real.