31-year-old catering manager Kelli Sedgefield was caught off guard in her regular coffee shop Gulp Town Thursday, when a stranger complimented her about her supposed lack of makeup. Before leaving the house, Sedgefield had applied her normal combination of a BB cream, concealer, highlighter, bronzer, eyeshadow, two layered colors of eyeliner, waterproof mascara, lip liner, lipstick, and a light gloss on top of the lipstick. She had sealed in the look with a light dusting of mineral-based powder.
“He said, ‘I hate when girls cake a ton of makeup onto their face,’ and I was like, ‘Wait, is he insulting me?’ and then he said, ‘I wish they were all low-maintenance like you.’ That’s when I realized he really thought I wasn’t wearing anything.”
“I was making small talk with this random dude about the flavored coffees,” reported Sedgefield, “and I don’t even remember how we got talking about makeup, but that’s when he told me that her preferred women who opt for the bare-faced natural look, like I have. I was like, ‘Huh?’” Sedgefield said the comment surprised her so much that she just sat there in confused silence, and didn’t point out the man’s mistake. “It all happened so fast,” she said.
Sedgefield said she felt like such a fraud after the encounter that she stopped wearing makeup altogether for a few weeks out of guilt. During that time, she again ran into the man from the coffee shop, who told her she looked sick. “He asked me if I knew anything about juicing,” said Sedgefield.
Sedgefield retaliated over the next two weeks, by applying a heavy smoky eye, filling in her brows with a dark pencil, and wearing a bold red lipstick reminiscent of the 90s grunge era. She powdered her face heavily to accentuate the look. It was on about Day 11 of that phase that the coffee shop man showed up and offered to get Sedgefield some help for her apparent drug addiction.
“At that point I just gave up,” said Sedgefield.
The next day Sedgewick showed up to Gulp Town wearing her normal combination BB cream, concealer, highlighter, bronzer, eyeshadow, two layered colors of eyeliner, waterproof mascara, lip liner, lipstick, and a light gloss on top of the lipstick, all sealed in with a light dusting of mineral-based powder. “The guy was at the coffee shop when I got there,” said Sedgefield. “He told me how relieved he was that I had reverted back to my natural beauty, and didn’t feel the need to wear makeup like other women he knows. He says when you’re beautiful on the inside, that the beauty just radiates outward, and you don’t need to paint it on – especially if you juice.”
Sedgefield again didn’t correct the man, but instead thanked him and kept her mouth shut, at which point the man quickly added that his name was Steve.
