Woman Utterly Blindsided by Dinnertime

Authorities reported this evening that local woman Shayla Davis suffered a surprise attack of dinnertime, which arrived much earlier than she was expecting.


“You never think something like this could happen to you,” said Shayla, who on her drive home from work had made the conscious choice to not stop at the grocery store because it sounded boring.


She also neglected to order anything in, nor did she have a clear sense of what ingredients she had at home.


Shayla arrived at her apartment at 6:30pm, and from there, her evening continued to spiral out of control. When asked to relive the fateful moments that led to unexpected dinnertime, Davis could not confidently account for the hour between 6:30 and 7:30.



“I’ve been asked this so many times, and my story is the same. I was probably on my phone or something.” Whatever she was doing, one thing is certain: she was not preparing for what came next (dinner).


At 7:30, Shayla finally noticed it was the time by which she would normally be eating her third meal of the day. In a weakened state, she checked her kitchen cabinets. This only confirmed what she already suspected: they contained only a bag of stale gummy worms and an unopened bottle of sesame oil. Not a dinner in sight.


Fortunately, a concerned neighbor dialed 911 when they heard Shayla’s screams.


“It crept up on me,” recalled Shayla, shivering under a blanket while emergency workers surveyed the devastating scene, where there was not a single dish or food item in sight. “I didn’t even see it coming.”


Shayla had been blindsided by lunches before, but never dinner. Referred to in some areas as “supper,” dinner is often more caloric and culturally significant than lunch. Its sudden surprise impact, therefore, can be much greater on the individual. This is something that Shayla didn’t fully grasp until living through it.


Shayla’s roommate Lori, who was out of town at the time of incident, expressed sympathy but not surprise at the precipitating events that led to this tragedy. Shayla made a consistent habit of mooching off Lori’s home-cooked meals. Said Lori, “It’s about time she learns how to feed herself. But realistically, she probably won’t.”


Shayla’s hope is that news of her traumatizing event will warn others that if they’re not careful, the same thing could happen to them.


“People need to stay vigilant,” she warned. “I don’t mean to sound alarmist, but there might be a dinnertime coming for you next.”