Why I Support the USPS Even Though My Lake House Has a Magic Mailbox

The U.S. Postal service is so important. It delivers things like lifesaving medications, letters from family, and all sorts of necessary supplies to people around the country. That’s why I support the USPS, even though my lake house has a magic mailbox through which I’m able to communicate with a man living here two years ago.


This is kind of a “me” thing, so take it with a grain of salt when determining public policy.


Of course, not all mail is magical. It takes a lot of hard work and organization to get packages where they’re going. And delivery services like FedEx and UPS often don’t deliver to rural areas, which would leave many helpless without the USPS.


I don’t really have that issue because my beautiful yet haunted Lake House is located not far outside Chicago. Also the only mail I’m looking for is from my mystery lover from the past. I don’t understand why this is happening but I can’t stop sending him letters.


Many people are not as lucky as me. They desperately need to be able to send in their absentee ballots come November. The future of our democracy is at stake. Except for the man who lived in my lake house in the past, because he is not yet experiencing this horrible year. I hope I get to meet him someday.


The USPS is a service mandated by the constitution and it has received no federal funds since 1982. It is vital to the function of our country and provides jobs to 600,000 workers nationwide.


I imagine those jobs are as vital to them as my ability to send messages through time and space. Just because I have a magic mailbox in my beautiful lake house, doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate the importance of this service.


We have to save the post office. Our Senate has to pass the USPS Fairness Act. And I need to find out why I am getting mail from a man who lives in my lake house in the past. If anyone can help, please do.


But first, let’s save the USPS.