When you’re down in the dumps, there’s no one who can cheer you up quite like your mom. But also, there’s no one who can boil your blood with a single phrase or sound or shift in tone like your mom, and it’s kind of a toss-up which version of her you’ll get over the phone at any given time. Take this quiz to determine if calling your mom will make you feel better or if it will make everything 1000% worse in 30 seconds flat, dredging up things from your past you had buried long ago and feeding the flames of fury.
What are you calling your mom about?
- Just a general feeling of sadness that I can’t shake. Whenever I feel like this, I know my mom will remind me I’m loved and doing fine!
- My job (which she does not respect), my boyfriend (whom she does not respect), and my finances (which are bad). I hope she’ll take to these topics well!
Does your mom have any experience dealing with mental illness?
- Yeah! She suffers from anxiety and depression herself, so she really “gets it.” She’s always told me to be kind and gentle with myself, for I am simply a human being learning how to live.
- Yes. She has experience dealing with it poorly. When I have anxiety she says, “Don’t,” and when I’m depressed, she says, “Stop.”
What has been your mom’s vibe as of late?
- She’s gotten really into spirituality and seems to be living her best life. Her energy has been really positive lately!
- She’s renovating the house, so her energy has been rancid to say the least. I’d say she’s pretty stressed and on edge always.
What is your level of patience right now?
- High! I’m not doing great, but I would love to have a long conversation with someone I care for, especially a conversation that has an undercurrent of mutual understanding.
- I’m kind of at my wits’ end here. If someone cut me off in traffic, I would probably buy a gun.
RESULTS:
Mostly 1s: You should call your mom! It sounds like you could really use some parental guidance right about now, and your mom is more than up the task. This is what moms do best, after all!
Mostly 2s: Put the phone down very slowly. You don’t want to risk accidentally dialing. Neither you nor her are in the right headspace to chat, and this bodes extremely poorly. You should absolutely not call your mom right now – it will make things much worse. Instead, maybe try figuring everything out yourself and calling her when it’s all already fine. You’re welcome!
