‘I Have Amazing Gaydar,’ Says Woman Who Won’t Realize She’s Bi for Three More Years

24-year-old Houston native Iva Agarwal bragged to friends about her “amazing” gaydar yesterday, unaware that in exactly three years she will realize she is a fully, unapologetically bisexual woman.


“I just have this amazing gaydar,” she said, unaware of the beautiful evolution she has just begun to undertake. “Like, if anyone is putting out even the tiniest gay vibes, I can sense it from a mile away.”


“See that girl over there?” she said, pointing at a bartender. “I can tell she’s a top because of the energy she’s putting out into the world.”


Friends found this fledgling moment of near self-awareness adorable.


“Iva’s been telegraphing her queerness to us for almost a year now,” says friend Shannon Tarver, who will be the first to hear the big news in November 2023. “I’m not sure she has made the connection yet, so we’re just gonna let her figure it out on her own.”


“It’s like a sixth sense to me,” said Iva, who will be drunkenly making out with a girl in the same location two years and nine months from now, which will force her to come to grips with her incredibly obvious bisexuality.


“Like that guy over there – he has powerful bisexual vibes,” she said, powerfully projecting her own feelings. “But he’s probably afraid to admit it.”


“She literally doesn’t stop talking about this,” adds Shannon.


After talking to the bisexual man, the group of friends ultimately agreed that Iva’s gaydar is, actually, pretty amazing.