Breakups can be messy – especially when your ex starts spreading lies about you to a trained professional. Everyone’s side of the story is “valid,” of course. But how could you let your ex ramble on about how you’re too addicted to your phone to experience emotional intimacy when that’s only, like, half true? If he’s paying $120 an hour to convince some shrink he was right about the incident at your sister’s wedding, then you need to make sure you get an opportunity to set the record straight. Here’s how to make sure your ex’s therapist knows your side of the breakup:
Figure out the shrink’s name.
Most guys drop a clue during the breakup. They’ll say things like, “Dr. Lipsett thinks the way you approach dieting is emotionally abusive to the people around you.” Or, “This is exactly what Cynthia means when she says you don’t listen.” Well you did listen. And now you can reach out to every registered therapist named Cynthia in the metro area.
He said one of the reasons he broke up with you was because you didn’t respect his privacy, so you might as well get something out of it.
Book a free 15-minute intake call with the therapist.
Write a script in advance so you stay on message, and make sure to use your ex’s full first and last name so the therapist knows exactly who got too drunk at your dad’s second wedding and humiliated you in front of your stepmom. This is a great hack because you don’t have to pay for the session, but it’s still protected by HIPAA laws. Professional ethics should prevent them from taking you on as a client, but at least they’ll know your side of things the next time they see your ex. It’s important they understand how much he’s hurt you when your ex starts spinning propaganda about your sexual incompatibility.
Strive for personal growth.
Now that your ex’s therapist knows how immature he is about money, you can rest assured knowing you’ve cleared the hurdles on his path to personal growth. If your ex really puts in the work and gets honest with himself and his therapist, he has a chance to realize just how right you were all along and become a better man. In reality, you’re doing him a big favor.
Here’s to mental health, accountability, and boundaries: all things your ex’s therapist will finally know you have in abundance once she hears your side of things. Thanks, Cynthia!