Calling out problematic behavior in your family members can be uncomfortable, but the vulnerability of discomfort can be the grounds for meaningful discussion and change. If you’re willing to go to bat for what you believe into a stranger on the Internet, then you must be willing to do the same in your own home. It might get messy, but you can do it. Here’s how to call out your family members for refusing to eat pussy.
Bring it up casually, but often.
A formal meeting to discuss rug munching might not convey the idea that they should be working cunnilingus into their daily lives and worldviews. Instead, bring it up every chance you get. Mom would rather make “polite” conversation about how your neighbor is going to med school than talk about something real? Tell her: “A gynecologist is a pussy doctor. We should all be monching that; why aren’t you?”
Expect excuses. Don’t accept them.
Your family members have been conditioned to make excuses for their unwillingness to muff dive. It’s your responsibility to push back. When your dad says that this topic is making him very uncomfortable, ask him to imagine how uncomfortable you are thinking of a world where he’s not eating as much vag as he can reasonably accommodate. If your mom says she can’t eat pussy because she’s in a monogamous relationship with your pussy-less dad, tell her you’re not coming to Thanksgiving this year.
Remember: No one is exempt from eating pussy.
It’s imperative that you normalize conversations about slurping poon. It may be easy to write-off older family members as too set in their ways or not worth the effort, but the consequences of their actions are as real as anyone else’s. That means Grandma and Grandpa are not off the hook. So give them a call like you’ve been meaning to. The conversation will fly by when you’re asking them a series of invasive questions about how often and how vigorously they are feasting on vagina. Don’t let them leave this world pussy starved.
So try out these tips to initiate a discussion about each of your family members’ unique responsibility to eat pussy, except for your cousin who’s too down to talk about it, we guess he’s all set.
