It can be tough getting back in the dating game post-divorce. But now that you’ve dried your tears, upped your Zumba game, and learned how to shave your vulva, you’re ready to hit the modern dating scene! Whether it’s Tinder, JDate, or that DJ your cousin keeps trying to set you up with, it’s important to pick a spot that will remind your date that you used to be somebody:
A Classy Bistro
You and Anthony shared wonderful years together, although his explosive Italian temperament eventually made it impossible to maintain a meaningful relationship. Luckily you’re still on the friends-and-family discount at the bistro, and the chicken parm is so, so good. This will also offer a great chance to draw comparisons between your ex and your date by posing questions like, “Anthony has a severely overbearing mother who is obsessed with him, and she’s sitting at that front table. What is your relationship with your parents like?”
A Bed & Breakfast
When you and Andrew ran the Evanston Inn, it was voted “Most Romantic B & B” four years in a row. Why should you and your potential new mate miss out on all that romance just because Andrew is a slimy little weasel who siphoned your life’s savings into a string of online poker failures? Even if Andrew has let the place run down a bit since you walked out, you can still enjoy the Egyptian cotton sheets and gluten-free muffins. Point your beau towards the window seat and say, “That’s where my youngest was conceived.”
A Cool Hipster Bar
Nothing will intimidate your blind date like this secret old-timey speakeasy hidden in an alley behind a bodega in East Bushwick. Your ex Tristan will serve you both absinthe that may or may not be laced with meth in a vintage Star Wars Pepsi can. He’ll ask about the cats and insist you only speak in a German accent. Sure, the two of you were only married “as an experiment” to ironically “balk at the whole idea of institutionalized hetero monogamy,” but Tristan’s speakeasy is a great place to swing by to remind new dates that you’re tangentially connected to coolness.
A Dentist’s Office
This unconventional date spot will show your quirky side, while managing your oral hygiene and giving you a chance to catch up with Dale! You and Dale didn’t get a chance to have your usual dinner or coffee date this week because little Mickayla and Geoffry both had the flu, so Dale offered to give you and your date free check-ups and fluoride treatments. What an amazing chance to introduce your blind date to Dale, who is still your best friend! Plus the fact that Dale’s office is littered with holiday family photos will give you a great chance to share all of those precious memories with your date!
Show your date that you once shared the bed of a business-owner. Who knows, maybe the two of you will one day have your own Etsy store!