Though Thanksgiving is usually about enjoying family delicious food, Grandma has decided to pull a fucking 180 this year and let you know that you can “go easy on the potatoes.”
After goading you into eating several cinnamon buns, pea soup, two glasses of cider, and roughly one quart of cranberry sauce, Grandma then turned to look at you and say, “Just don’t forget about portion control, dear.”
The fucking sudden change of heart was noticed by everyone.
“All my mother ever does on Thanksgiving is force people to eat more food,” Aunt Patty says, “But I guess she has her limits.”
Witnesses say that when you spooned mashed potatoes onto your plate, Grandma blindsided the whole table by saying, “Careful, dear, those have a lot of butter in them,” while staring directly at you.
By the end of dinner, Grandma was reportedly pulling fucking 180s all over the place, pushing the gravy toward you then saying, “You know you can always try eating some veggies first,” and offering you cornbread as she says, “You know it’s so unfortunate that you got your father’s metabolism!”
In a continuation of crazy behavior, Grandma pulled her final fucking 180 by slicing you up a large piece of pumpkin pie with a goddamn snowdrift of whipped cream on top and placed it in front of you, saying, “Eat, dear, aren’t you hungry?”
