The bathroom is a sacred space, one that should bring peace and clarity to your mind. Your bathroom could be a peaceful palace, if not for your roommate Catherine’s sweaty sports bra hanging next to your fresh towels. Bring emotional harmony and positive energy to your shared bathroom with these feng shui tips that will also remind Catherine that she needs to stop leaving used tampons right out at the top of the trash and get her shit together like a normal person.
De-clutter your sink countertop.
Clutter traps negative chi, so place your bathroom necessities evenly against the back of the counter as if to say, “Look how organized this is, Catherine; totally out of your way if you want to wipe down the counter after you spray your floss detritus everywhere.” Then, turn your toothpaste toward the southeast corner of the sink—the natural magnetism will capture her attention and remind her to put the fucking cap back on if she’s gonna keep using your toothpaste, goddammit.
Add green plants to your décor.
Bring lightness and natural energy to your bathroom by adding fresh and simple greenery. Bamboo is great for bathrooms because it is hardy, surviving even when Catherine sloppily drapes her wet washcloth on top of it (it’s like she goes through her whole morning routine with her eyes shut, fuck). You can also cleanse the negative energy from Catherine’s toothbrush by baptizing it in the bamboo’s mossy water.
Burn candles and incense.
Incense and candles are fantastic for ousting negative energy from your bathroom and for making Catherine worry about her hanging laundry catching fire. Place your incense or candles on top of your toilet to get rid of unwanted bathroom odors and hopefully Catherine’s pile of dirty laundry. If she freaks out about how close the flame is to her clothes, that can only remind her that maybe she shouldn’t keep her sweaty yoga pants there in the first place.
Play relaxing music.
There is no better way to transform your bathroom into a space of positive energy than by playing music. Natural sounds like ocean waves really say that you need Catherine to remember to flush.
Post inspirational messages.
Inspirational messages are a surefire way to promote positive thinking, so put your interior decorating skills to good use and purchase a bath mat with an inspirational message of your choice. Whether you go with a warm and fuzzy Gandhi quote or an effective custom message that maybe reads, “Bathrooms are a place for being clean,” you are sure to promote a communicative, positive environment and put your messy roommate in her goddamn place.
Feng shui can really revitalize a space, especially if it leads Catherine to get her act together and pick up a sponge once in a while. Namaste!
