DUDE CORNER: I’ve Never Seen My Friends Be Sexist Because I Have A VR Headset on Most of the Time

Dude Corner

Sup ladies! It’s Dude Corner back at it again! I’m pretty fucked up from being in this gamer chair for three days straight, but anyway, I gotta talk about a serious topic for a sec: Some girls I know told me that my group, like, my main group of brohams have engaged in sexist and harassing behavior, and I was like, what? That’s impossible! I’ve hung out with them for years and I’ve never seen them mistreat a woman even ONCE. Then again, I have been wearing a VR headset for most of the past five years, so I might of missed something here or there.

 

The thing is, my bros are extremely respectful bros who would never harm a woman – even if she’s being kind of a bitch.

 

I also believe in the idea of innocence until proven guilty. And unless I can actually see one of my bros engaging in this despicable behavior because I am too busy doing VR porn in the corner while we’re at a party, I can’t prove it happened. This makes me very smart.

 

So you might be saying, “But dude, like five women told you some pretty convincing shit about your friends, don’t you trust them?” And trust me, I DO trust my girls. I was just busy playing Superhot while they were talking so I didn’t really pick up on any of the nuance of what they were saying, or most of the words. So I definitely trust that they would never lie to me, I just really only picked up on a few words while the Bluetooth disconnected for a minute. So I have to assume my bros are innocent until I have my VR headset off.

 

 

In the end, I’m a data-driven dude, and unless you can scientifically prove to me that my bros are assholes or show it to me by personally removing my VR headset, I just have to remain open-minded about it. But just remember that if you take off my VR headset while I’m in the middle of a campaign I will fucking kill you. And that’s how you know I’m a good guy! Later, losers!!