It can happen to anyone: You’ve gone adventuring by yourself in an old abandoned mine, and got stuck in a collapsed mineshaft again. You’ve definitely got to get out before you suffocate to death, but can you do it without being such a little drama queen and bringing everyone into your bullshit again? Take this quiz to find out:
Your phone battery is low. Do you…
- Send a drop pin to the nearest contact and call the first available emergency service and hope they don’t get mad.
- Text your most recent ex, the one where things are still kind of weird, and ask him to help you. And if he has like 50 guy friends he could bring, that would be awesome <3
You’ve got a pick and a headlamp. You…
- Know that no matter how much you dig, you’ll run out of oxygen before making any headway. Save the headlamp for when help arrives (they know you on a first-name basis by now).
- Use the headlamp to take a pretty decently flattering selfie, and post an Insta with the caption “Got stuck in a mineshaft again :( DM me if you’re around”.
You see a pin of light through the dirt! You…
- Gently pick at it with your tools to patiently and carefully make your way out, since you’ve definitely don’t this before.
- You get close to the hole and yell, “Can somebody helppp meeee?” for hours until somebody finally gets sucked into your drama, and stops everything they’re doing just to “save your life”. Ugh, what is wrong with you?
Results:
Mostly 1’s and 2’s – Sorry, bitch! You cannot get out of this mineshaft without bringing everyone into your drama. It’s true: There is no way for you to get out of here without causing another media frenzy or getting some eccentric billionaire to try and get you out. Why do you keep doing this? You shouldn’t be going inside mines. This is exactly why your ex said you were toxic! Next time you think of going in a mineshaft alone, maybe go to therapy instead?
