Both Members of Relationship ‘Totally Cool’ with Title-free Existence

Couple - Reductress

Three months after their first date, Shelby Dash and Patrick Whalen confirmed they are both “totally cool” with their decision to continue dating without putting any kind of title on their relationship.


“We’re just going on dates, texting incessantly, and relying on one another for comfort and emotional support,” said Dash. “Why try to define that?”


Whalen added that foregoing titles would keep their relationship light, fun, and unburdened by terms and conditions. “Labels complicate things,” said Whalen, who recently surprised Dash with a toothbrush to keep at his place. “We’re simply enjoying the benefits of dating without the pressures and behavioral responsibilities that come with defining it.”


The couple noted that, while taboo words like “boyfriend” and “exclusivity” would add unrealistic pressure to their relationship, they had recently opened a dialogue about the possibility of moving in together.



“We would both really benefit from the split rent, and my commute to work would nearly be cut in half,” Dash said, excluding all mention of emotional entanglement whatsoever.


“My roommates love her too,” Whalen added.


At press time, Dash was seen fielding text messages from an ex-boyfriend while Whalen went into the men’s bathroom and punched a hole in the wall.