You’ve spent a lot of time hanging with the guys lately, and they sure seem to feel comfortable around you. But is this because you’re a chick who can hang, or a humanoid version of their favorite breakfast? Here’s how you can tell:
Is your crooked smile in response to their dirty jokes or is that just how bacon is shaped?
If you are constantly smirking at the way your dude pals incorporate the word “penis” into classic songs, you are the kind of laidback girl they’ve always wanted to hang with. If your face is fixed in a static, if winning, smile, that is because your mouth is a wavy strip of bacon.
Are you not like other girls because you are down for whatever or because you are food?
They’re constantly saying that you that you aren’t like all the emotional, sensitive chicks they know. If this is because you keep your discomfort about their misogyny and hygienic inadequacies on the down low, you have successfully shown them that you are chill enough to earn an honorary dude title. But if they think you’re different because your eyes are eggs and your mouth is bacon, you are a collection of breakfast foods.
Do you love meat or are you a meat product?
You are not having any of this chia seed, kefir, salad with cranberries bullshit. You don’t count calories! You live in the moment like a man! If you enjoy consuming burgers, steaks, and sausage, you are a total bro, even if you are still all cute and skinny. If you are incapable of eating and are greasy and made of dead animals, you are probably an animal product or bi-product.
Do they feel comfortable around you because you are super chill or because you are a meal?
They can talk about anything around you, from their fave porn stars to the things that they don’t think are racist but just want to make sure. If this is because you always respond with a high-five or a, “Yeah, dude,” you are one of those special ladies who basically has balls. But if they are comfortable speaking their minds around you because you are a meal and can’t understand them because you don’t have ears or a brain, you are just a face made of bacon and eggs.
Hopefully, this quiz has given you some answers, but it’s important to keep in mind that even if you aren’t a cool girl and are instead a cute breakfast, guys totally like you just as much.
