Step Hem Crew Neck Tunic Sweater in Dark Yellow (Express, $59.90)
“Oh my gourd, I’m coming!” you’ll yell as you thrust on this pumpkin sweater. Tell this season to take you from behind with this high-low hem. Don’t forget to snap pics of your filthy tryst with an ephemeral time of year while sitting on an adorable haystack in reverse-cowgirl!
There’s a chance people won’t think you’re banging this season if you aren’t wearing various tones of mustard, sunset, citrine, gold, brass, honey, amber, corn, daffodil, butterscotch, sunflower and straw. How else are you going to brag about your deeply erotic relationship with a specific time of year unless you wear marigold? So do yourself a favor and rush to buy a spicy mustard sweater before you look like nobody is coming all over you!