In an ongoing struggle with no signs of forthcoming relief, Sandra Pla was torn last Monday over precisely what level of sexual detail to divulge to her therapist.
“I wanted to talk about this new guy I’m seeing and how I’m concerned about our sexual compatibility,” Pla says. “And normally I spare no detail when it comes to setting the scene of my therapy anecdotes, but just as I was about to explain how wet I get when I jerk off compared to sex with him, something stopped me.”
“I know she’s my therapist and I’m free to tell her literally anything that doesn’t require mandated reporting, but it somehow felt grossly inappropriate,” Pla adds. “Maybe it’s because I was Zooming her from my bedroom and she would know that that very room was where the sex was happening, or maybe it’s because she looked so innocent and unsuspecting sitting there in her big scarf.”
For Pla, it’s not the first time she’s had difficulty being transparent with her psychotherapist in the name of decorum.
“I mean, sometimes when I’m feeling really sad and pathetic I try to soften it a little so I don’t make her uncomfortable,” Pla says. “So of course I couldn’t be sure whether to tell her in direct terms how I want kinkier sex than my current partner and I are having.”
But maintaining this degree of decency comes at a cost.
“There was one thought I really wanted to work through,” Pla says. “But it would have required me to say ‘cum’ as a noun, so I just started complaining half-heartedly about work instead.”
Though she’s been unable to work through it, Pla is not without theories regarding the source of her discomfort.
“Well, my therapist is a white woman in her early 60s, so I guess it feels weirdly like talking to my mom about sex, which I would never do,” Pla says. “Maybe instead of talking to her about sex I can just tell her that theory and we can spend some time analyzing that. I have to give her something.”
Pla’s therapist denied our request for comment, but it’s pretty obvious she would rather hear sex deets than spend another session talking about her patient’s mom.