Woman Named Cody ‘Just Wants To Be Treated Like Everyone Else’

Chicago native Cody Bender made an official statement last week, wishing to be treated like anybody else who is not named Cody.

 

“People make all these unfounded assumptions based on my name,” says Bender, who holds down a steady job in data entry at an advertising agency.

 

“Cody is good at her job,” boss Sal Montañez states. “But I want her to be happy and follow her dream of being a bassist. I mean, I’m just assuming that’s her dream based on the fact that her name is Cody.”

 

Bender states she has no intentions of quitting her job, in spite of the fact that she is approached by at least five tech start-ups and graphic design companies per week.

 

“We think Cody would be a great fit at Circuit Media,” says Circuit CEO Duncan Braylock. “She is probably a testament to our new spin on traditional modes of communication.”

 

 

Chicagoans rally behind Bender during this time. “So rebellious, that’s what I love about Cody,” says barista, Sloane Perez. “It may seem like she drinks black coffee every morning, but looking at her name on the cup, I can tell that it’s more complex than that – that’s why I secretly call her Cody Kerouac.”

 

Friends of Bender have encouraged her to express herself more. “Though she hasn’t said anything about it, I can tell that Cody came from a painful upbringing,” says friend Karen Snow. “I’m pushing her to express her dark emotions. I presume she could make an amazing light installation about her pain.”

 

At press time, Bender claimed, “A woman named Jennifer would never deal with these kinds of unfair assumptions.”

 

Snow has other concerns about her friend’s well being: “She won’t even set up a blog, or smoke cigarettes, or express a complicated relationship with gender. This just isn’t typical Cody behavior.”

 

The National Association of Codies (NAC) has yet to issue a response.