In a devastating story coming from an apartment in Ann Arbor, MI, 26-year-old Ina Rodriguez has to do her laundry today even though it feels like she practically just did her laundry three weeks ago – a.k.a. no time at all.
“I woke up and noticed that I had run out of clean underwear,” Ina told reporters while sitting on her bed, working up the confidence to stand up, pile her laundry together, and take it all the way downstairs to her in-building laundry room. “I just can’t believe I ran out so fast when I’m pretty sure I just did laundry the week before last week.”
Reporters confirmed that “the week before last week” does technically refer to three weeks – or 21 days – ago. Ina only has about 12 pairs of underwear, so something isn’t adding up.
“The cycle of constantly having to do laundry is really breaking me down,” Ina continued, seemingly forgetting that she has not done laundry for almost a whole month. “What am I supposed to do? Do laundry every single day? What’s next? Doing the dishes every single day?”
Reporters were slightly confused by this comment, as it is quite normal to do the dishes – on average – every day.
“The demands of adulthood just do not stop,” Ina said while actively sniffing through the socks in her laundry hamper to see which ones she could technically get away with wearing for another day.
According to Ina’s roommate, Violet Reese, even the three-week-long timeline seems like a lie.
“I’m pretty sure I saw her do laundry five weeks ago and then never again,” she whispered to reporters. “I’m also pretty sure she’s never washed her sheets.”
When pressed on whether she regularly washes her bedsheets, Ina said, “Oh my god, of course! I’m not an animal. I just did that two or three months ago.”
Reporters kindly informed Ina that this is definitely not frequent enough, which seemed like a big surprise to her.
“This is ridiculous! Are you guys going to tell me that I should probably wash or dry clean the scarf I wear every day even though I just did that in 2018?” she pushed back, using a pretty bad example.
While reporters replied that she should absolutely do that, they added the caveat that most people still don’t.
As of press time, Ina had decided to finally do her laundry, and it took all of two hours. Still, she has determined she will be unable to achieve anything else today.
