There are a million reasons to want to have kids, and while all of them are valid, the main reason I want to start a family is so I have people to pass my debt on to when I die.
I’ve always felt there was something uniquely beautiful about leaving things to your children and loved ones in your will. To be able to remember someone after their death by inheriting something they left specifically to you seems like a wonderful way to remember who they were as a person, reflect on your relationship with them, and recall that even though they’ve passed away, they’re never truly gone.
I don’t have any earthly possessions to pass on, but I do have an unbelievable amount of crushing debt, and that’s better than nothing. I just like knowing that my children will have something to remember me by when I’m gone. It’s a legacy, of sorts. Not a good legacy, of course, but it’s better than just immediately disappearing into eternal nothingness, with no one to remember you and nothing to remember you by.
My children will utter my name every day after my death, if only to curse me to the heavens and lament the fact that they were ever born.
My children will remember me as the person that completely screwed them over financially for the rest of their lives. Every time my children check their credit score and inevitably see “Poor,” they’ll instantly think, “My mom did that.” And I think that’s beautiful.
While, yes, I know that debt doesn’t instantly transfer to your children when you die, I have a plan in place to ensure that my children will become saddled with my mountain of unpaid loans. It involves a significant amount of fraud and manipulating my offspring into co-signing my ill-advised loans under false pretenses. That way, when I die, I ensure that they’ll still be tied to me in the most tangible and earthly way possible: by owing a large sum of money to a major bank.
Honestly, I think that’s a better way to be remembered than just willing them a diamond ring or something. I only have one diamond ring, anyways, and that baby is getting buried with me.
But, truly, at the end of the day, it’s not about material items or being remembered or any of that, it’s simply about starting a family –– and not feeling pressured to pay off any of my debts in my lifetime.
