In a concerning story emerging from the kitchen of Ola Harrington, the 27-year-old has found herself taking a strange pleasure in tidying up the space before bedtime.
Ah, fuck! That’s bad, isn’t it?
Sources confirm Ola was about to head up to bed when she decided to put on a podcast and deep clean the kitchen, an activity which filled her with immense joy for a reason she cannot quite place.
“I just love going to bed knowing that my space is clean and that when I wake up in the morning, all will be in its rightful place,” Ola told reporters gathered at the scene, where she was scrubbing down the counters lest they accumulate dust. “Should I be concerned about that? I feel like yes.”
Ola took so much pleasure in cleaning the kitchen that she figured, “Why let the good times stop there?” and decided to extend her tidying boundary to the nearby living room.
“The magazines on the coffee table had been haphazardly arranged, and there was a bit of dirt on the rug,” she continued, feeling the need to justify why she spent another 25 minutes on tasks like wiping the living room baseboards. “I couldn’t leave it in disarray, and now that it’s clean, I do actually feel amazing.”
Researchers have found that one of the most surefire signs of aging – right after the appearance of wrinkles and smile lines – is finding unexpected joy in the process of cleaning your house.
“If you ask someone ages 13-25 how they’re feeling after they complete a large cleaning task, they’ll use words like ‘tired,’ ‘frustrated,’ and ‘annoyed,’” said Lead Researcher Walker Hyde. “But when we asked people ages 25+ to describe the same feeling, they answered with phrases like, ‘walking on air,’ and ‘finally at peace…peace at last.’”
Sources confirm that before this year, Ola never really enjoyed cleaning and instead found it rather tedious.
“I never understood why my parents did it all the time,” she continued. “But now I get it. There’s a certain joy in restoring a sense of order. Oh, fuck. Does this mean I’m old?”
Reporters said not necessarily, but one of them guessed it might mean she’s ready to be a parent if she’s into that sort of thing.
As of press time, Ola had decided to stop cleaning and instead retired to her bedroom, where she found just as much joy in completing her nighttime skincare routine and stretching before bed.
