The 10 Most Fuckable Balloons in This Year’s Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade

The Red Mighty Morphin Power Ranger Perhaps the sexiest, most-fuckable, balloon of all, is that of your first pre-teen wet dreams; The Red Mighty Morphin Power Ranger. He’s joining the parade this year and he’s already in the position for some action. All those fantasies of unbuckling his T-Rex belt and letting him take you with his superhuman strength, matching helmet still on, are only 50 to 100 handlers away. Your pussy could be the Pink Power Ranger, and together, the two of you would destroy evil. Sweet, sweet, morphin’ time. If you want a real shot with any of these fine, eligible, hot-air filled icons, we suggest getting to the parade around 3am for a prime flirting/eye-fucking spot. If you're content just to have the fantasy, though, turn your TV on at 9am Thanksgiving day for a titillating couple of hours. Stuffing won't be the only thing you've got an appetite for this year.