Still No Vaccine, But You Are Allowed to Engage in Riskier Behavior

Proving once and for all that life is all about tradeoffs, there’s still no vaccine for the novel coronavirus, but you are allowed to engage in riskier behavior.


“I definitely wish there was a vaccine,” says New York resident Riley Stewart. “But at least now I can see friends and go out for drinks and stuff. It’s a lot better than being stuck inside my apartment.”


“Why did we even do that?” Stewart adds.


Why did cities across the nation partake in a difficult but collectively minded initiative to curb the spread of coronavirus only to then reopen at the cost of countless human lives? We can’t say for sure, but it’s certainly nice to see the sidewalks crowded with people eating brunch out of plastic takeout containers like New Orleans but with $20 eggs and somehow worse public safety hazards.


“I’m glad things are going back to normal,” says Stewart. “I missed hanging with my buddies, which I was still doing before, but now I don’t have to feel all weird about it.”


But not everyone shares Stewart’s enthusiasm for the new coronavirus non-solution.


“I guess I thought that the point of the lockdown was to stop spreading the disease while the government figured out concrete ways we could deal with it going forward,” says Chicago resident Bree Lennox. “But now it just seems like we’re giving up on that, and all the while we continue to find out more terrifying information about Covid from healthcare workers and people who have had it.”


“I feel pretty confused and scared,” adds Lennox.



Well confused and scared may be the name of the game, but at least now we’re all free to do things that will make the situation worse.


“A couple months ago it felt like we were all making sacrifices to protect each other, especially our most vulnerable populations,” says Lennox. “And I just don’t know why that stopped.”


The answer is money!