QUIZ: Is She Actually Hot or Just Inexplicably Sinister?

Sometimes we come across a total hottie, and we can’t quite pinpoint what it is about her that’s attractive to us. Is it her good looks, sex appeal, and charm? Or is it her aloof yet cutting, eerily seductive, darkly magnetic nature? It can be helpful to know if your crush is actually hot, or if she just exudes big antagonist energy and you understandably mistook that for sexual charisma. Take this quiz to see if she’s truly a keeper, or just inexplicably sinister!

What’s the first thing that drew you to her?
1. Her smile. :)
2. Her knowing smile. Although, I guess others might call it a smirk, or more accurately, a sneer.


Describe her sense of humor.
1. She’s really observational, and we totally see things the same way.
2. She laughs quietly when I express concern for the suffering of others. Also she cackles at her own unexpressed thoughts, in between cigarette puffs.


Which is more of her vibe?
1. Rachel from Friends meets Rachel McAdams in Spotlight.
2. Gill from Finding Nemo meets Angelina Jolie.


What’s her favorite music?
1. She likes a lil bit of everything, but mostly R&B and indie folk.
2. Beethoven’s 5th in C Minor, exclusively.


What’s her Hogwarts house?
1. Hmm, I’d say it’s a tie between Gryffindor and Hufflepuff. Or maybe she’s a Ravenclaw?
2. I don’t even have to answer this question. She calls her favorite jacket “Malfoy chic.”


Would she get along with your siblings and parents?
1. Sure. She’s shown interest in meeting them already. Maybe in a few months, if things go well!
2. She said family isn’t really “meaningful enough as a value proposition” to her. But she did say she has some accomplices she wants me to meet, after my initiation, so that’s kind of like meeting her family?




Mostly 1’s. Congrats! You’re definitely dealing with someone who’s standardly hot and most definitely not a villainess, but you probably already knew that! So, you don’t have to worry about being ensnared by the death grip of a seductive little vixen, but on the other hand… you don’t have to worry about being ensnared by the death grip of a seductive little vixen. Trade-offs, I guess!

Mostly 2’s. Congrats! Your crush definitely radiates vaguely menacing energy, for reasons we do not know at this time. But we do know that if this is the movie of your life, she is absolutely the antagonist, and the story will end terribly. But tragic endings are so romantic, and her villain energy is just so sexy! Sometimes you just have to risk it all for love, right? Godspeed!