Oh No! Vegan Friend Comparing Animal Consumption To Racism on Thanksgiving Again

After inviting all her friends over for a cozy Friendsgiving in her Brooklyn apartment, 28-year-old Ingrid Langston’s vegan friend, Rebecca, has begun comparing factory farming and consumption of animals to racism again.


Oh no! Not again!



The dinner was going splendidly until Rebecca soured the tone of the night by comparing animal consumption to several racist human atrocities before the entrée was even served.


“I don’t even want to repeat what she said,” says Ingrid. “Of all days she chooses to do this on Thanksgiving, which is already a terrible holiday. I was just trying to eat good.”


“I wanted to enjoy Ingrid’s cooking,” says Peter, another guest. “But instead I had to explain to a grown woman the difference between a bird and a brown person.”


Sounds like the Thanksgiving spirit was in full flight, because the evening only escalated from there!


“If you check on my Instagram, I have a lot of posts about how animal cruelty has existed before all oppression,” says Alyssa, in response to no one. “It’s truly the original sin.”


When someone mentioned Thanksgiving’s roots in American settler colonialism, Alyssa replied: “If animals ruled the world, there would be no colonialism.”


Okay, Alyssa!


“If we were eating cats on national cat day, I would understand her reaction,” says Ingrid. “This white girl is going to yell about birds like I did not spend all day trying to figure out what seitan is for her.”


After having done this at the past handful of dinners, Alyssa has been quietly kicked out of the group chat and banned from the friend group and any future Thanksgivings.