Romantics everywhere are commending Newport, CN local Meghana Senna on the three-month anniversary of her one-week situationship. It’s official: She’s managed to turn a week of unfettered romance into months of painfully redundant and dull conversation.
You go, Meghana! It did mean something!
Sources confirm the relationship – if you could even call it that – began with a casual introduction to a man at a bar, progressed to barely two hookups, and ultimately ended when he decided he was a bit too busy to start anything, especially considering they weren’t super compatible.
This last part fed about five weeks of conversation alone!
There is very little to dissect about the story, but that hasn’t stopped Meghana from giving it her goddamn best. Topics have spanned the gamut from whether true love exists (hard to decipher from this instance) to whether she, herself, is unlovable (probably not, but again, tough to say with such little context).
Meghana brings up the fling any time she can, even if she and her friends are talking about someone else’s relationship drama or not talking about relationships at all! At brunch last week, before ordering eggs, her friends report she smiled softly and whispered, “Henry liked eggs.”
It is unknown whether this is true, because to reiterate, she knew him for five days!
Reporters speculate Meghana is clinging to this brief encounter because she honestly doesn’t have a lot else going on. She’s mined it for unbelievable amounts of conversation fodder, and now claims to have a firm grasp on “casual dating,” even though last month she said she would have started a relationship if he had asked.
Whatever you say, girl!
Meghana has talked about it so incessantly that she’s starting to forget the real story and replace facts with her own embellishments. For example, she now swears that as he left, Henry said, “In another life, I would have really liked doing laundry and taxes with you,” when that is a line from the movie Everything Everywhere All at Once and does not make sense in this context.
When reached for comment, Henry said, “Oh, Mariana? Yeah, she was nice. Chill. Why? Did she say some stuff about our thing?”
Sources confirm Meghana has said three months’ worth of “stuff” about their “thing”, which she maintains has informed the way she pursues all romantic attraction now.
At press time, Meghana has hit it off with a new boy who is leaving town forever in three days. With any luck, she’ll be able to keep this one in the conversational rotation for at least a few years!
