I Would Never Get Plastic Surgery – Unless Someone Else Paid for It

 I love my body, flaws and all. I love my skin, and all its nooks and crannies, and the parts of me that make me, well…me! Plastic surgery just isn’t something I need to make me feel good about myself. If other people want to do that, that’s fine – I just think it’s crazy to spend all that money just trying to conform to society’s standards of beauty.


Of course, if that plastic surgery happened to be free or close to free, I mean, I would be open to discussing this.



Beauty is dictated by the whims of society, and change from generation to generation in arbitrary ways, so it’s silly to go to great lengths to chase the status quo, just to fit in or be liked. Sure, I take care of my body, but to cut and chop it in order to fit into this narrow box of acceptability? Absolutely not! Unless of course, someone were to pay for it, in which case – who am I to judge?


The idea of engaging in body modification just to cheat the inevitability of aging seems so silly – we’re all going to die someday! Then again, I do a lot of silly things when my rich friends offer to pay for it, like go to Tahoe, or get a breast lift. Who am I hurting??


My body is a temple, but even temples are like, “Okay, yes, I need a paint job but I am NOT paying for it.”


Because when it comes down to it, money can do so many powerful things, like fight climate change, or support people in need, that it just seems frivolous to spend it on something as silly as a facelift. Which is why if that facelift is free, you can’t possibly argue that I’m doing anything wrong. Trust me, I’ve tried for a solid five minutes.


While I stand for loving the skin you’re in, no matter what – I’m just saying that if someone has $30k that they don’t need, it would be sort of cool to see what a butt lift would be like? Just as a thought experiment.