I LIVED IT: My Crush Didn’t Know Their Birth Time

I Lived it:

People say it’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. But some people never even get the chance. I had hoped that the person I loved shared the same values, goals, and aspirations as me, but when I recently found out they didn’t know their birth time, I realized I now have nothing to live for.


How am I supposed to procure this person’s astrological chart when they don’t even care about the precise time that they were born?!


I’ll never forget the moment it happened. I was at my favorite coffee shop, full of Adderall and cold brew. Emboldened by the chemicals coursing through my veins, I texted my crush, “what’s ur birth time?” They texted back, “idk lol, why?” And that was the last I heard from them, because I threw my phone at the wall. It was now worthless to me.



Without my crush’s birth time, I can never know whether we’d be truly compatible. I do know they’re an Aquarius sun, which means they’re creative but guarded, and they’re a Pisces moon, which means they like to smoke weed. But without their birth time, there’s so much missing information: Are they a Cancer rising, which means when we make love it’ll be like a crab passionately clinging to a lion? Or are they a Libra rising, which means when we bone it’ll be as though my breasts are being weighed on a pair of scales? Or are they a Virgo rising, which means it’ll be their first time? I guess I’ll never know how compatible we are, because there’s literally no way for me to find out. And it’s like they don’t even care.


I should have predicted this. Co-Star told me I would have trouble in sex and love this week, and Co-Star was right. Co-Star was also right that I would have pressure in spirituality, because after learning my crush didn’t know their birth time, I no longer believe in God. What kind of universal power would create a world of such uncertainty?!


After learning to accept that this kind, beautiful, amazing person didn’t know their birth time, I had no choice but to cut off contact. But maybe it’s for the best; after all, they’re an INFJ.