Fall Recipes You Can Whip Up While He’s Unhooking Your Bra

Todd is fidgeting with your bra hooks again, and based on experience, he’s gonna take a while. His bumbling maneuvers have him worked into a frenzy, and you don’t want to embarrass him by doing it yourself, so why not use the time and sexual energy to whip up some yummy fall recipes that’ll have him muttering, “Sorry, sorry, almost got it.”


Harvest Quinoa Salad

The best part about this colorful fall salad is it’s quick and easy—only about 30 minutes from prep time to presentation. By the time you’ve garnished the dish with pomegranate arils, he should have at least located the hook. The lag time combined with his constant apologies might be a turn-off, but the fruity smell of this salad is sure to get you both excited again! Just try not to make out with Todd while he struggles or this will set you back another 20 minutes.


Ginger Butternut Squash Soup

This dish is deceptively simple—much like the design of a bra clasp. Todd’s finally gotten one of the hooks undone, so go ahead and busy yourself mincing ginger so as not to disturb his progress. Just like the expletives he keeps mumbling in your ear, this soup is sure to warm your body right up in even the chilliest fall weather. He’s really tinkering away back there. Is he building a bomb?



Maple Glazed Chicken

Todd somehow managed to re-hook the clasp, so now you’re back at square one. Not good—and you’re getting hungry. You haven’t heard from Todd in a while, so just make some maple-glazed chicken. Todd may have become ensnared in the bra strap itself, like a duck in a six-pack ring, but you’re making a glaze that’s simple and simply to die for. When you texted him to come over at 1am, this really isn’t what you had in mind.


Salted Caramel Pecan Cobbler

Todd, if you’re out there, send a sign. A gorgeous salted caramel pecan cobbler is done, and you’re hungrier than you are horny at this point. Figure the bra out later—just give a shout to say you’re okay, Todd.
When your guy is struggling to undo your bra, don’t let the opportunity go to waste and make one of these delicious fall favorites. It won’t do much to fix his woeful inadequacies in dealing with women’s lingerie, but at least you’ll have a warm, home-cooked meal!