Dad Calling You Because He Somehow Knows You’re High Right Now

In an unexpected surprise right after you took a huge bong hit, your dad is calling you and it’s obviously because he somehow knows you’re high right now.


Witnesses report that you have no idea what to do because you are very high.


“I’m not sure how he knows, but he knows,” you said. “How am I supposed to face him now?”


While your dad must know that you smoke from time to time, he definitely doesn’t know how often you do it, or how stupidly high you get, and you don’t want to tarnish that perfect image of yourself in his eyes.


“If I answer the phone right now I’m sure I’ll cough a lot, then ramble on about the government for half an hour, then forget what I was even talking about,” you said. “And then he’ll know I’m high for sure! I can’t give him that.”


Your friend and roommate Tasha was also able to comment on the crisis occurring in your shared living room.


“I think you’re just really paranoid,” she told you. “Maybe just take a deep breath and call him back later?”


However, you were extremely resistant to taking her advice.


“But then he’ll know something’s up,” you said. “There’s just no way to win here. There’s no way!”


“On the one hand, it could be an emergency,” you said. “But on the other hand, I can’t handle being this high on the phone with my father. Like – at all. Oh no! It stopped ringing!”



At press time, you called your dad back when you were less high, and it turns out that he was just wondering who sang the song that went like “woman, woman, woman, I could be your woman,” … allegedly.


“Next time he calls, I’ll just pick up the phone,” you said. “Unless I’m high again, which, if I’m free to talk on the phone, I definitely will be.”


Fair enough!