Compliments From Guys That All Mean, ‘You Used to Be Fat’

Getting compliments from men is as easy as stepping out of your house. But when you’ve done a crash diet and are rocking up to five pounds of badass water-weight loss, how can you tell if men actually think you’re smokin’ hot or are just noticing you’re less fat than you used to be? The following comments may seem straightforward, but trust us, these guys are really thinking about how much bigger you used to be:

 

“I like your haircut.”

Sure, you got a trim, but your hair doesn’t really look that different. What’s different about you is how much less fat you are after you really committed to Crossfit these last two weeks. That’s definitely what your coworker is actually noticing. What a cad!

 

“That dress looks good on you.”

This old thing? You’ve worn it before, and he’s never said anything until now? But since your three-day juice cleanse, it totally hugs your curves (or lack thereof, because you’re so skinny now!) in new ways. Your date is letting you know your big old body wasn’t worthy of this look—until today. Hold this guy at arm’s length, because he clearly hates the fat girl you used to be.

 

 

“You look nice today.”

So your doorman said you look nice, but he also said “today.” As in, not eight days ago before you gave up your nightly froyo sundae trip. It’s truly made a huge difference in how you feel—and look. Last week you were a froyo-hoarding cow, but today you look nice. What an improvement! He obviously wants you to know how fat you once were and currently are not.

 

“I want to tap that lil’ ass.”

Yes, you’d rather not experience daily street harassment from the creepy dude who hangs outside the deli on your corner. But in this case it’s useful—notice that he said “lil’” ass, as in “ass that isn’t fat anymore now that you’ve been doing a five-minute glutes workout on YouTube sometimes after work, when you remember to.” Unfortunately this witty observation clearly means, “You used to be fat.”

 

Men can be clueless, but they know one thing—you used to be fat, before your most recent and possibly fleeting attempt to eat right and get in shape. But today, you do look pretty great, so soak it up! You just reincorporated solid food into your diet, so who knows when you’ll be not-fat again?