Every fit lady knows that the best place to pick up guy is at the gym. But if you have a tendency to profusely sweat “down there,” here are the some tips for the butt sweat pattern that will really get his attention. From crack to crotch, it’s time to show him what he never knew he wanted:
Thin Crack Line
Get a nice sweat trickle going just down the center of your butt – you know, right down the crack. This will show him you’re a woman who works hard, but not too hard. It’s sleek, sexy and says, “You see this butt? It has a crack in it. Maybe you should see where this happy trail ends… or buy me dinner.”
The Pee Stain
This is a great pattern to try for women who excel at making it look like they’ve peed themselves during a workout. Focus the wet spot on the crotch area and avoid letting it spread too far up the crack – the goal is to create a sopping pool surrounding your crotch. This one can’t not make him think about your wet vagina.
A great pattern for excessive back sweaters, Butt Cleavage requires sweat to pool just at the top of the butt where the crack starts. Don’t show off too much crack, just the right amount – like Rihanna at the Met Gala. He’ll be love-struck by your good form and your targeted butt sweat region.
All Over (Whole-Butt)
Sometimes after a long workout, it may just look like you sat in water. This pattern attracts the most attention, as it’s the weirdest and saddest. If you don’t really have a specific type of man in mind and are looking to experiment sexually, use the Whole Butt technique. You’ll probably find someone of the opposite sex who is just like you. There’s one of them at every gym.
The Butt-erfly is only to be used by experienced butt sweaters or women who have taken one of those wine-and-paint classes. Using special underwear and specific butt movements, sweat an intricately symmetric figure of a butterfly onto your ass. Use the crack as the butterfly’s body and sweat out onto the cheeks some beautiful wings. Please get a picture if successful, cause we’re all really excited about this one.