How To Tell Your Barista To Stop Writing ‘Bitch’ In Your Latte Foam

Your neighborhood coffee shop is perfect. They have free wifi (password: BeanLatifa), everyone knows your name, but there’s one problem: The barista always writes the word ‘bitch’ in your latte foam. Every day. It probably happens to lots of people, and while you do want him to stop, you also don’t want him to think you’re annoying or overly sensitive. Here are five ways to tell him to stop without damaging your chill-girl-at-the-coffee-shop reputation:

 

Break it to him gently.

Lead in with some small talk before politely asking him to stop writing ‘bitch’ in your latte foam, Try asking him about his day. If he’s taking the time to use such beautiful artistry to insult you, he’s probably has a lot of anger built up inside. Assure him it’s not his fault! It’s totally, totally, totally not his fault, even if he did stab a hole at the bottom of your cup while you watched.

 

Give him another outlet to call you a bitch.

Offer your Twitter or Instagram handle so he can call you a bitch online, where men are most comfortable insulting women. This way, he can still call you a bitch, but in a space that really works for him and his needs. It’s hard for him to express himself in healthy ways!

 

 

Offer to pay for Latte Art classes.

Pay for classes so he can learn to write other things in your latte instead of ‘bitch’. Hey, maybe ‘bitch’ is all he knows. It’s probably what you learn first at latte school. If you don’t live near a place that offers latte art classes, offer to fly him to Brooklyn.

 

Just go with it.

Accept it as playful flirting, and hell, just go with it! Men call women bitches all the time in a super playful way, and it doesn’t always mean they have a personal vendetta against you. And this guy is flirting with you via your latte! It doesn’t get much better than this.

 

If you still feel nervous about making a move, remember: This is your cup of flavored warm milk, not his platform to call you a bitch. That’s what the rest of the world is for!