10 Tips That Won’t Make You Chrissy Teigen

Statistics show that only one in every four billion women have the skills to be just like the sexy, domestic goddess that is Chrissy Teigen. That means just one of us can live the dream: Chrissy Teigen. You’ll never be as hot, charming, or wonderful as Mrs. John Legend, no matter how well you apply these tips we put together to attempt those things:

 

  1. Use a deep conditioner for your hair.

Once a week, apply a hair masque onto your oily mop and let it sit for 5-10 minutes. After you’ve washed and dried it, your hair will be soft and shiny—but not as shiny as Chrissy’s hair, or Chrissy’s personality, or pretty much everything in Chrissy’s life. Bummer!

 

  1. Wear underwear that makes you feel sexy.

Whether it’s a lacy black thong or a frilly pair of boyshorts, the perfect pair of underwear can help you exude confidence and make you feel super sexy—unfortunately not “Sports Illustrated cover model Chrissy Teigen” sexy—just “regular person” sexy.

 

 

  1. Learn how to make zucchini fries.

Nobody can cook quite like Chrissy can, but you can at least try! Chrissy’s recipe for zucchini fries is a healthy take on a fast-food favorite that is sure to be a hit at your next dinner party (which probably won’t be as fun as one of Chrissy’s parties, sorry.)

 

 

  1. Exfoliate your skin.

Chrissy’s got a face that could launch a thousand ships. Use an exfoliating salt scrub on your basic face to achieve a look that could maybe launch a few paddleboats! Also have you seen her tweets? She’s amazing.

 

  1. Take a yoga class.

To get Chrissy’s sculpted physique, you should start off easy and sign up for a yoga class. Don’t feel pressured to show up, though—you’re not Chrissy, so nobody’s expecting you to be on the cover of anything.

 

 

  1. Bake a pie.

Even if your boyfriend isn’t an uber-talented R&B star, you could still make a yummy, sweet treat for him (even if he is made-up and lives in Montreal).

 

  1. Master the high ponytail.

Chrissy has great cheekbones and she loves to show them off. Show off whatever so-so facial structure you have by pulling your hair up and away from your face into a messy ponytail. Kinda nice!

 

  1. Get a sun-kissed glow.

Chrissy’s skin is literally flawless. Use a bronzer to cover up your countless blemishes and achieve Chrissy’s ethereal golden tan at the same time. You’ll look like you’ve been vacationing in Ibiza, though everyone knows that unlike Chrissy, that’s something you could never afford.

 

  1. Do some squats.

C-Teigs has a naturally perfect booty that was sculpted by the gods. Your butt looks like it was sculpted out of ice cream. Put on those sneakers you bought four years ago but have never worn, and feel the burn of not being able to have Chrissy Teigen’s ass!

 

  1. Make something with spaghetti squash in it.

Creating healthy alternatives to unhealthy foods is what Chrissy is all about! Stop eating your daily vat of mac n’ cheese and replace it with a bowl of spaghetti squash and tomato sauce! Delish. Oops you ate a lot more then Chrissy would have eaten.

 

Let’s face it, even with these great tips, you’ll never be anything like Chrissy Teigen. But don’t let that stop you from trying!