4 Lip Stains That’ll Make You Look Like a Naughty Little Imp Who Ate All the Cherry Tart

Womanspiration

Woman in STEM? This Woman Ironed a Pleated Skirt with a Hair Straightener

Surprisingly, the experiment worked.

News

Woman’s Unpopular Opinion Actually Extremely Heinous

“I know this opinion is too edgy for some people to deal with.”

News

REPORT: Remote Work Leads to Drop in Gentle Little Kisses When You Do a Good Job

In 2020, intimate yet platonic lip-based rewards of all kinds fell off due to social distancing guidelines.

Womanspiration

Brave! This Woman Psychoanalyzed Her Friends Without a License

“For now I’d rather go with my gut. What’s the harm?”

News

‘I Just Want Someone to Fight for Me,’ Says Woman Unwilling to Change in Any Way

“Maybe she should try journaling or something?”

News

Smithsonian Zoo Plans Prom in Hopes That Giant Pandas Enter Pact to Lose Virginity

The zoo is extremely hopeful the pandas will fucking get it.

Womanspiration

Remember the Election? This Woman Doesn’t

“Oh right, right, right. So, did Hillary win?”

News

Police Remind Community That ‘Pride’ Wouldn’t Even Exist Without Them

“It’s important to commemorate how we gave Johnson the opportunity to really shine.”

News

Woman Giving Up on Creative Dream After Three Months Thinks She Will Make it Through Law School

Although Ashley has not yet taken an LSAT practice exam, she is confident that she will be a natural.

News

‘I Won’t Bother You Anymore,’ Says Man Who Plans to Message You Every Time You Post Something

Experts predict that when you eventually block Rob, you will spend an inordinate amount of time feeling bad about it.

Thoughts

Help! A White Person Corrected Me on Black History, and They Were Right

I hope you know that, like your ancestors, you have ruined another Black life.

Thoughts

Why I Will Continue to Act Shocked That No One Has Ever Been to The Gas Station Chain That Is Local To My Home State

At least tell me you know about their mint-flavored coffee machine!?

News

Every Part of Woman’s Body in Pain from Workout Except the One Muscle She’s Trying to Exercise

Well, better luck next time, Kat!

News

‘Why is My TikTok For You Page All Lesbians?’ Asks Woman Who is About to Realize Why

“No, I’m straight.”

News

Woman Who Doesn’t Floss Considering Spending $90 on Teeth-Whitening System

“If I’m going to have receding, disease-riddled gums, I may as well have bright white, almost iridescent teeth to distract from them.”

News

‘I Actually Can’t Whistle,’ Says Woman Who Also Can’t Do So Many More Important Things

Sources closest to Elliot report that she also cannot swim, braid her hair, pay taxes, cook, or ride a bike.

Living

4 Ways to Berate Siri Without Being Anti-Feminist

Use these tips to berate Siri in a way that promotes the liberation of marginalized genders!

Living

How to Overcome the Insecurities Instilled in You By Wii Fit

Try a ritualistic burning of your Wii Balance Board.

News

Energy Healer Unable to Manifest a Coherent Website

“I know it’s a little hard to read, but I want my website to feel different, you know? Because I’m different.”