It’s common knowledge that cigarettes are bad for you. They’re known to cause cancer, not to mention a host of other issues, but this doesn’t seem to deter people from smoking. There’s somehow still a pervasive cultural narrative that cigarettes are sexy, that they make you look “hard” or apathetic in a cool way, but this couldn’t be further from the truth. Here’s why I believe cigarettes are visually disgusti – oh, a woman is holding one? Haha, never mind!
Cigarettes ruin a visual aesthetic for me. Oh, you think a little white stick in your hand makes you look tough? You think it makes you look like you’re cooler than other people? Grow up! You’re putting your own life at risk and the lives of those around you, and it’s selfish. Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean you, ma’am. Proceed as you were!
You see, when a woman smokes, she is making a beautiful commentary on the fleeting nature of desirable femininity. She’s taking a stand. She’s living life by her own rules. God, she fucks. When a man smokes, I should be allowed to punch him in the face.
When I see a cigarette, I physically cringe. Except when I see a cigarette in the hands of a woman, in which case my eyes pop out of my head, my jaw drops, and my tongue rolls onto the floor. I cannot explain this reaction, but I fear it has been ingrained in me since birth. There is something so disgusting about a man taking a break by having a quick cigarette on a street corner, but there is something so beautiful and brave about a woman doing the same. Do not ask me why. I am not accepting questions.
A man blowing his cigarette smoke all over other people is plain rude. Uh, we did not consent to being drowned in your cancer smell, sir! Put that thing out! If a woman is smoking, though, she is allowed to blow her smoke directly into my mouth. Please spread the word.
I understand one could argue this is a double standard, but there are double standards for men and women in every other area of life, too, so suck it up! When a woman holds a cigarette, she is holding a middle finger to the idea that we women should shrink ourselves for men’s comfort. Oh wait, it’s hitting me now. I might just be gay.
