In an understandable story out of New York, NY, analyst Wendy Xu is a little disappointed that her boss called her into his office just to give her more work rather than to fire her.
Sources confirm it’s not that Xu is “upset,” per se, just a little let down.
“Like, yeah, all things considered I guess this is a good thing,” she told reporters. “But I had already planned what I was going to do with a few weeks off, and it’s just hard to let that vision go, you know?”
Witnesses from Xu’s office report that she looked saddened as she returned to her desk and gave the trash can a light kick along the way.
Sources report that there was no reason for Xu to assume she was about to get fired: Her performance has been stellar over the past few weeks, and she’s only ever received positive feedback.
“Still, there was a part of me that held out a bit of hope,” she admitted.
Xu then zoned out, reportedly imagining the many things she would have done with severance pay.
“We couldn’t be happier with Ms. Xu’s performance,” her boss said. “In fact, we think she can handle even more responsibility here at the firm!”
An audience survey confirms this is a terrible, inhumane way of thanking an employee for their hard work.
Sources close to Wendy confirm that excelling at her job was not her intention at all. She is reportedly there “just to bag cash and vibe,” so it’s understandable that this development came as an unsettling shock.
“He was just like, ‘You’ve done a bang up job here, Wendy,’” said Xu, recalling the incident. “So naturally I’m left thinking: How is that possible? Where did I go wrong?”
“It’s a chilling reminder that this could happen to anyone,” said Xu’s coworker, Madison Wright, who is similarly terrified of receiving more work. “My heart goes out to her, and I’ll support her any way I can,” she continued, before clarifying that she would not be helping Xu complete any of the extra work.
