Why I’m Making My Kids Go to School on a Snow Day

Our family recently moved from Arizona to New Hampshire for my husband’s new job as a regional sales manager for Subaru. It has been hard to acclimate to the winter weather, but not nearly as hard as the blow I received this morning: My children are at home today because the school district decided it was “unsafe” for them to go to school. That’s right, a “snow day;” the school district’s bullshit excuse to keep my already-lazy children home all day with me.


I’m sorry, but isn’t that what the weekend’s for? I’m a modern stay-at-home mom like most of us, which means I have a life outside of my children. If I wanted someone to feed and interact with during the commercial breaks of Frasier reruns, then I would’ve home schooled my kids, or taken a lover. But I don’t, and that’s why they’re in public school, back-to-back after-school programs, and various church youth groups. I’ve got shit to do, and your inability to transport my kid safely to and from school is NOT my problem. This coming winter, I don’t care what you say, Little Harbour Elementary, I’m making my kids go to school on a snow day.


Some of you may be thinking, “But the school won’t be open, what will your kids do?” I don’t know, superintendent Baumbach, you tell me. All I know is that I’ve got water Zumba at 10am, so you better think of something, quick. Oh water Zumba is cancelled too? I don’t care. Get these little shits away from me.



I pay taxes to that school for things my kids don’t even use. Special Ed, that accelerated program, lunch. Maybe it’s time you use that fancy money for the music department and spend it on snow tires for your candy cane buses that are too afraid of ice. Alaska is all snow–do you think those kids stay home every snow day? Figure it out!


The school year is too short to begin with, and now you’re just canceling school days because you don’t feel like babysitting my children today? I don’t think so. It’s the platform I campaigned for in my unsuccessful PTA presidential bid, and it’s an issue I staunchly support in the mom blogosphere. Even though I lost to that goody-goody Marissa Catatano and her adopted child with Lupus from Ecuador, I think my views still ring true with most mothers.


This winter, I’m standing up for your right to have a little goddamned peace and quiet. If we all send our kids to school on a snow day, then they’ll have to open up their doors and their hearts, if they even have hearts. Who’s with me?


Anyway, I just bought a Groupon for an 11:30 still-life painting class, so we better resolve this today. I’ve got too much going to be your fucking babysitter.