Whoops! Everyone in Meeting Zoned Out Because They’re Thinking About Getting Laser Hair Removal  

Uh-oh! Looks like nobody at this advertising agency can remember the action items from their most recent all-hands meeting! It turns out that every last person in the room wasn’t paying attention – and was instead contemplating the pros and cons of getting laser hair removal.



“I couldn’t tell you what we talked about,” said Maya from Digital, whose Word doc was intended for meeting notes, but was instead populated with several links comparing the costs of different laser and skin care centers. “But what I can tell you is that it takes about a half a dozen sessions to achieve 80 percent clearance on any given part of the body – it’s a real commitment.”


While there was no consensus about the subject of the meeting, employees of the agency were able to agree that laser hair removal is something they’ve been thinking about for a while and that maybe they should just stop overthinking it and schedule an appointment already.


“We probably touched upon diversity and inclusion, but like in a vague noncommittal way,” guessed Isabella from Accounting. “The only thing I know for sure is that while laser hair removal may seem expensive at first, you actually end up spending less money in the grand scheme of things because you won’t have to worry about maintenance anymore.”


“And that’s before you incorporate the intangible value of peace of mind!” added Isabella, who has never before spoken this confidently about any belief she’s had in her life.


Not everyone came out of the room self-assured.


“I guess I left the all-hands with a lot of questions,” admitted Danielle from Legal. “Questions like: Would laser hair removal be covered by my insurance? Do I want this because I want this or because I think society wants me to want this? And can I take a sick day for this kind of procedure? Shit, I really should have been paying attention.”


Senior Vice President of Sales Stephanie Harris, who led the meeting, reflected on how her presentation went.



“I’ll be honest, I was totally winging it up there,” admitted Stephanie. “I was up all night Googling phrases like ‘laser hair removal does it hurt,’ ‘laser hair removal is it actually permanent,’ and ‘laser hair removal full body except scalp.’ I’m terrified and also definitely doing it… I think.”


At press time, a local dermatologist missed several calls requesting appointments because she too was staring into space wondering if she should get laser hair removal.